I just thought you should know the truth <3
This list of UK-based mental health contacts is printed in the zine, but I want it here too (click to make larger). If you would like a transcript, please message me and I can sort that out.
There’s some great support networks out there. People do want to hear from you, and they do want to try to help.
Get your copy of the zine here for £2.
There are days
When there is no way
Not even a chance
That I’d dare for even a second
Glance at the reflection of my body in the mirror
And she knows why
Like I know why
When she feels like she’s about to lose control
She knows how much control is worth
Knows what a woman can lose
When her power to move
Is taken away
By a grip so thick with hate
It could clip the wings of god
Leave the next eight generations of your blood shaking
And tonight something inside me is breaking
My heart beating so deep beneath the sheets of her pain
I could give every tear she’s crying
A year—-a name
And a face i’d forever erase from her mind if I could
Just like she would
But how much closer to free would any of us be
If even a few of us forgot
What too many women in this world cannot
And I’m thinking
What the hell would you tell your daughter
Your someday daughter
When you’d have to hold her beautiful face
To the beat up face of this place
That hasn’t learned the meaning of
What would you tell your daughter
Of the womb raped empty
The eyes swollen shut
The gut too frightened to hold food
The thousands upon thousands of bodies used and abused
It was seven minutes of the worst kind of Hell
And she stopped believing in heaven
Distrust became her law
Fear her Bible
The only chance of survival
Don’t trust any of them
Bolt the doors to your home
Iron gate your windows
Walking to your car alone
Get the keys in the lock
Please please please please open
Like already you can feel
That five fingered noose around your neck
Two hundred pounds of hatred
Digging graves into the sacred soil of your flesh
Please please please please open
Already you’re choking for your breath
Listening for the broken record of the defense
Answer the question
Answer the question
Answer the question miss
Why am I on trial for this
Would you talk to your daughter,
Your sister, your mother like this?
I am generations of daughters, sisters, mothers
Our bodies battlefields
Beneath the weapons of your brother’s hands
Do you know they’ve found land mines
In broken women’s souls
Black holes in the parts of their hearts
That once sang symphonies of creation
Bright as the light on infinity’s halo
I remember the way love
Used to glow like glitter on my skin
Before he made his way in
Now every touch feels like a sin
That could crucify medusa kali oshun mary
Bury me in a blue blanket
So their God doesn’t know I’m a girl
Cut off my curls
I want peace when I’m dead
Her friend knocks at the door
It’s been three weeks
Don’t you think it’s time you got out of bed?
The ceiling fan still feels like his breath
I think I need just a couple more days of rest
Bruises on her knees from praying to forget
She’s heard stories of Vietnam vets
Who can still feel the tingling of their amputated limbs
She’s wondering how many women are walking around this world
Feeling the tingling of their amputated wings
Remembering what it was to fly to sing
Tonight she’s not wondering
What she would tell her daughter
She knows what she would tell her daughter
She’d ask her
What Gods do you believe in?
I’ll build you a temple of mirrors so you can see them
Pick the brightest star you’ve ever wished on
I’ll show you the light in you
That made that wish come true
Tonight she’s not asking
You what you would tell your daughter
She’s life deep in the hell—-the slaughter
Has already died a thousand deaths with every unsteady breath
A thousand graves in every pore of her flesh
And she knows the war’s not over
Knows there’s bleeding to come
Knows she’s far from the only woman or girl
Trusting this world no more than the hands
Trust rusted barbed wire
She was whole before that night
Believed in heaven before that night
And she’s not the only one
She knows she won’t be the only one
She’s not asking what you’re gonna tell your daughter
She asking what you’re gonna teach
Nine Little Known Facts About Notable Women of Colour (MadameNoire)
Did you know Condoleezza Rice accompanied Aretha Franklin on the piano? Nina Simone’s involvement in the civil rights movement was sparked by an event at her piano recital when she was twelve? If not then read on…
Mom Forced Out Of Church For Breastfeeding - Aims To Change Georgia Law (Huffington Post)
Nirvana Jennette, a mom of four from Camden County, Georgia says she was forced out of church for breastfeeding her baby. Church leaders asked her to breastfeed in the bathroom and implied they could have arrested her for “lewd behavior.” The most egregious statement? She told news station WSAV that her pastor compared her breastfeeding to a stripper performing.
Teens Ask YouTube Commenters If They’re Ugly (Jezebel)
“People say I’m ugly, so tell me, am I?”
Does your menstrual blood attract bears? (Scientopia.org)
Well, does it?
Lynne Featherstone tells Church ‘don’t polarise gay marriage debate’ (Telegraph)
The Church does not have the exclusive right to define who should be allowed to get married, the equalities minister warns, as she suggests that religious groups have polarised the debate on gay marriage.
Why does it matter if a child has a same-sex crush? (The Guardian)
The ripples caused by a boy of seven coming out as gay shows society has a way to go before it views LGBT people equally.
India’s home ministry steps back from gay sex row (The Guardian)
Government lawyer tells supreme court gay sex is ‘immoral’, but TV channels report wrong statement may have been read out.
Are people who opt for medically unnecessary, cosmetic surgery psychologically vulnerable? Does having such surgery bring them psychological relief?
These are tricky questions. There’s actually evidence of increased mental health problems among people who’ve undergone cosmetic surgery. But whether that’s a harmful side-effect of the surgery, or a hangover from pre-operative problems, it’s difficult to say.
Randomly controlled trials would help, but of course that’s not possible in this situation for ethical reasons. What’s needed is a large-scale prospective study that follows thousands of people up over many years. Hopefully a sub-set will opt for cosmetic surgery during that time and then it should be possible to look for any psychological vulnerabilities preceding the surgery and any changes post-surgery.
That’s exactly what a team of Norwegian researchers have done. Tilmann von Soest and his colleagues began in 1992 with a sample of over 12,000 school students aged 12 to 19 years, and then surveyed them periodically for several years. Attrition of the sample left 2,890 participants at the final survey in 2005 (many participants were lost early in the study, in 1994, because they changed schools). By 2005, 106 of the participants had had at least one cosmetic surgery procedure. This included 78 women - that’s 4.9 per cent of women in the sample; and 28 men - 2.2 per cent of the men in the sample.
Because of the lack of men, the researchers focused only on the women. The majority of their operations were for breast augmentation (26.8 per cent) or reduction (19.5 per cent), with other procedures including liposuctions, ear and nose modifications.
There was strong evidence that women with psychological problems were more likely to opt for surgery. The female participants who went on to have cosmetic surgery were more likely to have a history of poorer mental health, including more depression and anxiety, more illicit drug use, self-harm and suicide attempts. Unsurprisingly, the women who had breast surgery more often had a history of less satisfaction with that part of their body (although general appearance satisfaction wasn’t related to undertaking surgery). By contrast, sociodemographic factors were not related to who had surgery and who didn’t.
Did the surgeon’s scalpel benefit the psychological health of these women? With one specific exception, it seems the answer is a categorical “no”. Breast surgery was associated with increased satisfaction with that part of the body, but having cosmetic surgery of any kind was associated with increases in anxiety and depression, eating disorders, more alcohol use and more suicide attempts. Surgery didn’t boost general appearance satisfaction.
The study isn’t without its shortcomings, as the authors acknowledge. For instance, the apparent adverse effects of cosmetic surgery may not be specific to cosmetic procedures but could apply to having surgery of any kind. The study also relied on participants reporting their own mental health.
This study provides “no evidence that cosmetic surgery should be used to alleviate mental health problems in women dissatisfied with their appearance,” the researchers concluded. “Nor do the results support the notion that cosmetic operations in exceptional cases should be covered by the public health-care system due to a potential psychotherapeutic effect for the patient.”
von Soest, T., Kvalem, I., and Wichstrøm, L. (2012). Predictors of cosmetic surgery and its effects on psychological factors and mental health: a population-based follow-up study among Norwegian females. Psychological Medicine, 42 (03), 617-626 DOI: 10.1017/S0033291711001267
Post written by Christian Jarrett for the BPS Research Digest.
All The Feels
Minus the horrible squeak. Plus a lot of background noise. But at least it’s not a squeak.
Emily rounds up the discussion on emotions with an overview of the real deal and the effect on representation and derailing of arguments for women.
Calm down dear, big boys don’t cry.
Emotions: a mini lesson in how sexism screws us all.
How are you feeling today YouTube?
If you’re finding it hard to cope, struggling emotionally or just need someone to talk to call the numbers below or visit their website for further help.
Samaritans: 08457 90 90 90
National Suicide Prevention Hotline: 1-800-273-TALK (8255)
National Hopeline Network: 1-800-SUICIDE (784-2433)
Outside the UK/USA
Visit http://www.befrienders.org to find your nearest helpline.
Tell us how you’re feeling:
I am an emotional creature
Poem by Eve Ensler. Check out her uh-mazing charity V-Day http://www.vday.org/home
Today I have mostly been feeling drained about work but excited that tomorrow I will be covered in chain grease and scooting about town on my new bike. How are you? How do you express your emotions if you do at all? I’m super verbal about mine but maybe you write or sing or play an instrument? I really want to know.
Our Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/ThosePeskyDames
Extreme PMS makeover. Trigger warning for depression/suicide.
Sorry the title was all I could come up with I’m tired okay?? Today I’m taking India’s spot and talking about PMS, PMDD, and my experiences with both. Enjoy, and get commenting in the comments! Lots of questions that I would like to know cos of reasons.